It’s quiet. You hear the droplets fall from the faucet. You hear every creak. Every sound. Every noise, traveling from it’s source to your ears to your brain. You recognize the sounds. You listen. There’s a void … you’re in it. Then there’s that chill. That slight chill that permeates through your body. It’s not cold. It’s air, the only other thing accompanying you. It’s there, invisible yet palpable enough to move you. You may even catch a smell, taste, touch. The sensations will come. They will be there around you, waiting ever so patiently to be perceived. Countless things are happening at this very moment. But here, in this space … nothing. Nothing. You look left. No one. Right. No one. Who’s there? No one. Because you’re alone. All by yourself. Alone. At this point, you let yourself become completely submerged in this reality. This sickness. This Solitude.
…when you start to imagine the possibilities. Possibilities are not realities. In fact, possibilities are just things that may happen. And with all the possibilities flying around , I’m finally ready for the responsibility of a reality. I want to be accountable for something real.
who is my friend I met this past summer. He’s pretty cool. One insane loser, he calls himself. Which is cool, I think. He likes white girls. Which is cool or whateva…if ya into that kinda thing. He has some hilarious friends too. We used to all sit around and laugh all summer. It was so fucking awesome. (<—- sounded soooooo white!) Anyways, we’re just sitting here on the couch. He kinda helped me with my extra credit…so thanks Johnta. Or whateva. He is insinuating that he should receive extra credit since I will be receiving extra credit. Hmmm…what is HE thinking?!?
Earlier, I wrote that Johnta’s girlfriend does METH. She does. But we’re gonna say she doesn’t to make him feel better. Anthony and I just smoked a bowl. I’m high again for the second time today. The highs are a little better now. A little distance in the time. I’m not supposed to be smoking…but whateva. I need a new glass of juice. I wonder if Johnta will be as nice as he was before….I wonder…I really do wonder. I need to call Matt so we can go get cigarettes, but Johnta thinks that since I can’t initially SPELL the word, I shouldn’t be smoking them anyway. Whatever.
Somebody tried my best friend Matt Muthafuckin Dean. Why the fuck would that bastard try my nigga?!?! I hate when people fuck with my friends. Anyway. I got two exams tomorrow. -_____- I know I’m gonna do well though so we’re good. Gotta go send some positive vibes into the air…with Johnta lol. (Whobythewaythinksiwantthedickandifindthatveryfuckinconceitedofhimtothinkthatbutimeanitiswhatitis.)
